Desperation, Again.

Even I once lived and breathed.
Even I, still need. I need.
I need...you.
Maybe?
I'm so lost, like a child,
afraid of the dark and cold.
Lonely nights....I hate this okay?
He said he's jealous for me.
I know He loves me...God, that is.
But what if I still hurt?
What if my chest is still brimming
with pain, and my heart is still
overflowing in shades of red and black?
What then...
Am. I. Loved?
Or just simply lost looking for it?
Illusioned, possibly, because I am clay
and I believe almost anything.
Stupid of me, isn't it?
All of a sudden sometimes I am my own affliction.
I don't know why. I don't know.
I never will.
Let me go then, because
you can't save me.
You don't love me.
And you can't know this.
So let me go,
please.