Unlock Me, Please.

There's so much wishful thinking.
You know the real me 

wouldn't leave you like that.
I know you're scared.

It's okay. Im scared too.
The stomach-punched, appetite stealing kind of scared.
And each thought that weaves back
to the demons in my head,
fills you with a fear and anxiety that's new
to even your darkest part.
You didn't want to leave me.
You didn't want to sleep.
I didn't want to sleep
for different reasons.
But I wanted to sleep too,
for as long as I could.
I can feel very little.
I feel you trying to push in.
Inside, I'm screaming for you to push harder.
Question me.
Pierce my heart with your words.
Push and push until I cry.
Get angry, get
irate until
you know I'm resurfacing.
Until I feel again.
Because you've seen it now.
Remember it kid, its a warning.
When the words stop coming,
When my eyes go blank and
I can't keep them locked on yours.
When my answers turn to sighs and one word
satisfactory answers,
don't let them satisfy you.
Push.
Fucking push in until I break.
Because I'm in here. I am in here.
And I can't get myself out.
I know from experience.
This time is different.
This time is worse.
I'm too tired to reach out.
So please, please
if you have the energy
reach inside of me
and pull me out.